Manscaping

Manscaping, the art of male hair removal, is all the rage. Sexy has been redefined to include a naked head, bare chest and groomed groin. Hairless is hot.

The Greatest Generation and Baby Boomer males had it easy, only trimming ear and nose hair. Gen-X and Gen-Y (Millenial) guys take longer showers and compete with their sisters for razor rights. Trailblazers for “bald is beautiful” include Seth Godin, Andre Agassi and James Carville.

 

Teenage boys initiated the current depilitory trend, taking hair removal south of the neck and navel.

History repeats itself: gold and copper razors have been found in 6000 year old Egyptian tombs. Hairy hieroglyphs simply do not exist. Sugaring, an ancient form of hair removal, is once again a favored tool for the manscape architect. Sugar paste is homemade and all natural, with no irritating chemicals. It sticks to the hair, not the skin, making it less painful than waxing. Kinder and gentler works for the half of species who were not engineered for childbirth.

Distracting fur can tip the scale of “I Love You Often . . . just not always.”

Here’s a recipe for the modern male who prefers to remove his hair vest:

Ancient Egyptian Sugaring For Hair Removal
(Recipe inspired by King Tut)

Ingredients:

• 2 cups sugar
• 1/4 cup lemon or lime juice
• 1/4 cup water

Directions:

1. Combine the ingredients in a heavy saucepan
2. Stir over a medium heat until mixture begins to boil
3. Reduce heat and simmer for 25 minutes until a soft ball is formed
4. Let cool and decant into a glass, plastic or tin container.

Apply:

• Dust your dry, clean skin with cornstarch.
• Use a popsicle stick to spread a thin layer of the sugaring paste over unwanted hair in the direction of hair growth.
• Press a strip of muslin cloth over the sugared hair.
• TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND MAN UP.
• Grip the end of the fabric and quickly pull against the direction of hair growth.
• Repeat until you are sufficiently deforested.

The caveman look is so yesterday. Evolution has rendered hair obsolete and unfashionable. Who needs the woolly mammoth in a world of space heaters and solar panels?

Julie and Jennie